Facebook status um 200 likesum..

Disclaimer: This is just a fun post. Details mentioned are result of mentally mystified random rumblings. The concept is inspired from a famous tamil movie. This has no connection with any of the face book status of ppl, in my friend list. So pls do not unfriend me!!!!

Intha  9 rules follow panna FB la like kottum bass!(Follow these 9 rulez and you are getting there)!

1.  1.     The most important rule, after posting a status or picture, keep refreshing the page every nano second and be very attentive. Drop reply for all the comments and like even the mokkaiest comment. In this game encouragement is very important. This task can be more tiresome than babysitting. But do not give up.

2.   2.    As this task requires concentration and dedication, hence please avoid drinking any liquid or having any solid food after posting a status or photo shopped picture. Yes, susu/ potty breaks are distractions which you cannot afford.

3.   3.    Add as many as possible friends to your friend list. They can be friend of friend, Have-never-seen-since birth relatives, spouse of friend, who gave you a no-other-option smile during your friend’s reception/wedding,met-while-waiting at hospital-during dengue fever- friends, friends of sibilings, sibilings of friends,etc. After all this if your friend list isn't crossing the pass mark 1000, please do not worry. Mark Zuckerberg will suggest you.

4.  4.     Whenever you see a lamo”ished”, sepia ied, HDRish image of your friend list member , that moment when your rational, logical conscience and mind fumes that "the picture seems uncanny, not having an iota of resemblance to the living/existing friend- member of your list", please extinguish it with ice bucket challenge and drop a “very nice” comment or at least caress the like button.Remember! "like" is boomerang.

5. 5..    Same holds good on really stupid status/currently-this-crap-is on my mind posts on the feed list. Even though your eyes hunt for a dislike button, don’t give in. Foreseeing unwanted conflicts, Mark Zuckerberg has clearly avoided that provision. So please keep sanity and repeat the previous step.

6.6..      If your status does not get any likes , do not back off.. Add a picture with the most famous member of your friend list or simply tag them and put a goody smiley. Start spamming your own post by bringing some HOT topics. Focus! I meant “some heated” discussions, chuddy buddy fights, ne-kolanthaya irunthapa-ithuthaan kuduthen memories.

7. 7..      Have a Happy birthday-with 100mm smiley,..Copied in your clipboard. Please follow mark zuckerberg’s instructions & post on the directed wall accordingly. Don’t look down at your conscience, your not the first. This is general FB ritual. People  hardly know the recipient’s name & least the date, while posting Happy birthday. But this should not deter you from posting a thank you when you receive such automated-happy birthday. 

8.  8..     Please be productive on weekends by joining photoshop and how-to-make-a selfie-look unrecognizable -by self acrobat classes .Then take vacations to farien locations, and pose in front of snow.

9.  9..     Some gloomy day when you login to FB for diversion, while waiting for your hopeless -exam results and if you get to see “aatha naa pass agiten” or at-chennai-international airport-off to ANTARTICA university, or got admitted in czsiferalo-university-in Helsinki university status posts, inhale cool air -  exhale hot air and hit a like! replay the dialogue "Like is boomerang". But, do not forget to Read and reread You can win by shiv kera , Deepak chopra motivational books after that.

My Banglore chronicles will continue soon....

HAPPY DAYS!!!

PG Chronicles Part-1

PG Chronicles Part-1

Boarded Bangalore mail, there I go, Chennai to Bangalore... accompanied by my father. I was prepared for the ride! Was excited to wake up WITHOUT early morning HIGH pitched “if you-sleep-like this after marriage-you’ll be kicked out by future in-laws” yelling’s,    ” when the hell - will you learn to -do your own work”-murderous one liners and many more heated daily dose of how -to behave- yourself lectures. But not to deny, a lone, big fat tear did peep out when my father bade me bye..Ahh I never knew I would miss my home!

We Reached Bangalore. I stepped inside the pg with indefinable excitement to live an independent life..I had few butterflies inside my tummy, when I had boarded the train, which I ignored to be acidity problem.  But after shifting inside pg, the fear of finding good friends, sharing room, maintaining patience, some feeling-sorry fear sunk..and There I go; the butterflies were replaced by eagles and ostriches inside my stomach in no time. History and geography of my past were enough to declare me a competent contestant for 24x7 Nonstop Talk show. But anxiety was about finding people who enjoyed talking and listening, the same way.

When it comes to talking, I talk so much, that..,whenever i am forced to give short non-commercial break to my audience, I unconsciously hand over the baton to mind voice.which continues mumbling... to be precised, I can talk-talk-talk and bore the hell out of anyone,  except “Good morning mam-we are calling from XXXXX bank-we offer free PLATINUM credit cards..”. Trust me they are the only people with whom I have shortest conversations, to them, I fail!

OK! During the dinner time, I met the gang..., after hi-hello pleasantries; we indulged straight into the mission of random talking. I found few incredibly talented co contestants, for the first time in life! YES... Then the national geographic channel in my stomach turned off automatically. We normally had small chat sessions daily, while having the not-at all-edible dinner at pg (Whenever I saw or tasted the PG food, my MOM appeared in the mind bubble and winked at me “KARMA pays akila, KARMA RETURNS,”).  Our daily discussions were about the useful piece of information we read in PAGE 3 columns, be it sympathising the 5 year old who fainted, seeing -without-make-up Priyanka chopra in her dreams, maintaining count of number of times the xxx guy  peeped into scarcely clinging dress of malaika in the dance show, Some strong neya nana sessions on “why did Jackie sheroff name his son “TIGER sheroff”? , celebrity Kismat cross connection and art of living conversations like how to maintain right BMI , by continuing OUR diet chart  which included, cheese pav baaji, panipoori , ghee dosa, 14 idlys, and more such “dietary delicacies”.

Sometimes, the repetitive/tiresome telephonic moral science classes by  parents on late night office returns,  co-operate for marriage campaigns, avoid-late night dinner treats will be converted to rom-coms. In fact, I never knew my virtually-erased with Camlin rubber- STRICT college days can turn out to be daily dose of laugh to many people. Some days we have had constructive conversations, very useful for life, like “how to-choose the best picture-from the batch of matrimonial photos -sent by parents”, benefits of honey, methods of wooing, the laws of attractions and repulsions, etc...Generally such life -skill –sharing chat topics were based on the need for the advices, and recipient’s skill levels